Enough letting go, enough being strong, enough tears... just ENOUGH!


Those of you who know me or follow me on social media know that the past few weeks have been a roller coaster of emotions for me and the people I love the most.

My Mom's been in and out of the hospital for the past several months and today I learned that they're doing emergency surgery for a perforated bowel tonight. 

Since I'm in Florida and she's in North Carolina I can't get there to be with her before surgery and I feel so helpless and worried. So I sit by the phone, candles burning, prayer beads in hand, and I wait. 

Then I received phone calls from my two best friends, sisters in my faith and my life, to find out that they're both saying goodbye to their beloved pets today. 

Ann Marie lost her beautiful cat Harold (who joins his brother Zeus, the German Shepherd, who crossed over just 2 weeks ago) late last night. 

And Erin, my dear friend in Virginia who's 7 months pregnant, has had to make the hardest decision any pet owner will ever have to make for their best friend as she lets go of her long-time companion Mr. Niles. 

We're the kind of people who love our pets with the same devotion some people reserve only for their children, and so feeling their pain is like feeling my own. And feeling it combined with my own is absolutely overwhelming.

Needless to say, it's a hard day. I know I will get through it; I know that my friends will get through it. I know that our love and compassion and all of our spiritual tools for healing will somehow carry us to the other side of the pain. 

And, whether we like it or not, tomorrow the sun will shine and the world will go on. We will grow, and heal and learn. 

But for today, I just want to say, ENOUGH.

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Okay, so in the interest of full disclosure, I'm having a little bit of a mini-meltdown today.

Why, you ask? Well...

My Mom's still in the hospital and is being prepped for surgery tomorrow, I've jam-packed my September schedule with some very demanding (albeit way cool) business opportunities that are totally stressing me out right about now, and I've had 3 different calls from 3 different people today letting me know that events I've scheduled for September and October have to be changed for one reason or another. {Deep breath}

I'm stressed out, more than a little overwhelmed and totally aware that all of these things are ~ somehow and in some way I can't even begin to understand just yet ~ in Divine order.

And yet they still suck when you're the one going through them. So let me just dispel any illusion that you may have that people who live a "spiritual" life are always balanced and serene (believe it or not, I get this a lot from people).

We're all human and we're doing the very best we can with what we're dealing with. So remember to have a little compassion for each other. All too often we have no idea what the person who's next to us in the grocery line, snarling at the cashier, is going through in their personal life.

As for me, I could cry or scream or throw a temper-tantrum. But really, I don't have the energy for all that drama right now. So instead, I'm turning off the computer and taking a nap.

As I fall asleep I'll be asking my Guides to comfort me, restore me and help me regain at least a little bit of my balance and serenity as I rest (or at least not kill anyone when I wake up).

Oh yeah, and if you see me in the grocery store wearing one slipper and mutter to myself while snarling at the cashier, don't judge me... it's been a rough week.
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